JFK Theory #2

Elvis testified before a congressional hearing in the early 60s that he felt the Beatles were detrimental to the morality of America's youth. This testimony did little to curtail the popularity of the Fab Four, but it did draw the attention of CIA Director Allen Dulles, who was on his way out following the Bay of Pigs fiasco.

JFK had earlier threatened to "splinter the CIA into a thousand pieces and cast them to the winds," and in spite of later recantations, the CIA still took that threat seriously. Dulles' replacement, John McCone knew it was necessary to take JFK out, but realized the CIA was under too much scrutiny to do the job well. So, at Dulles' suggestion, he recruited Elvis to their cause.

The deal was simple. If Elvis could arrange for JFK's death, the CIA would break up the Beatles. McCone put Elvis in touch with Jack Ruby, who in turn introduced him to Lee Harvey Oswald. Elvis stationed Oswald in the book despository, and took his position on the grassy knoll. And, of course, Oswald got the blame. Jack Ruby only shot him because he threatened to go public with Elvis' name.

The CIA held up their end of the deal by sending in their own operative, Yoko Ono, to break up the Beatles.

In 1977, John Lennon learned of the plot and confronted Yoko, who did her best to placate her "husband" and convince him that he was misinformed. In the meantime, just to be safe, the CIA had Elvis fake his death to get him out of the way. In 1981, the CIA decided to get rid of Lennon once and for all.

Elvis really did die in 1987, so the CIA faked Roy Orbison's death so they could bury the King. Roy has been living under deep cover ever since, working as a clerk in a 7-Eleven in Lubbock.