Monday, July 04, 2005

Happy Independence Day!

On July 4, 1776, the Declaration of Independence was signed and the United States of America was born. Or were born. Goddamn subject-verb agreement...

Anyway, at a time like this, when our nation (or at least 51% of it) is steadfastly united in the ongoing war against Muslims terrorists, monogomous gays, and stem cells, I feel it is important to remember the profound words spoken by George Washington on that monumental day:

"The preservation of the sacred fire of liberty and the destiny of the
republican model of government are justly consid... OW, FUCK! SPLINTERS!!!"
Ah. He truly was the Father of our Country.

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Here are some funny 4th of July cards, accompanied by snarky, smartass comments. What can I say? They made me giggle like Tom Cruise on Paxil.

5 comments:

mr. schprock said...

I think George borrowed a line from Pinocchio's wife…

porchwise said...

The cards were a riot but where did you find that picture of my grandpa drinking? I'm in that, the little boy on the wagon seat alongside my girlfriend just back from playing doctor/nurse in the barn. Also, the barrel burning picture is not, as you might suspect, the burning of the barrels thrown overboard at the historic Bosten tea party; it is the irate citizens of Evergreen,Alabama, burning bad batches of moonshine from Grampa's whiskey still.

hoverpants said...

Didn't Washington once say, "Father, I can not tell a lie, Arabs chopped down your cherry tree."?

Sylvana said...

Oh, I so seriously left a comment here the other day, and now it isn't here. I swear I'm living in some sort of alternate dimension. Or I'm schizophrenic. Eh, same-e-same.

SJ said...

'hoverpants' is a classic blogging name. I am duly impressed Mr. Pants.